Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Yes, Virginia, there is...

...still a blogger at this site. One, however, who stays too busy to post very often!

I break my fast of posts with a link to a much better resource than my own humble* blog: Eve Tushnet's latest at Inside Catholic.

The rest of this post doesn't really have anything to do with the above link.

One of the main reason's I started this blog was to publicly "talk through" what it means to be "gay" and Catholic. Much to my regret, I've never really used that blog for that purpose, however, partly because I didn't want to be too open about my thoughts and struggles as I learn how to deal with my same-sex attraction. As I've been sharing my story with other people, I've realized how powerful it can be to admit publicly, my sins, my need for accountability, the things that have helped me achieve the small victories I've won, etc.

I've also realized that my public speaking engagements, as well as the things I share with friends on Facebook, necessitate that I tell my family my full story. So far, they know only small parts of it. It's unthinkable that one of my Facebook friends should mention something about my unfortunately-not-yet-non-existant sex life to my parents and sisters who still believe I'm a virgin. Thry deserve to hear the truth from me, not from somebody who has heard me speak!

Perhaps, gentle readers, you will be so kind as to pray for the following:

1) that God will give me the courage to speak soon to my parents and siblings about this hidden (from them) part of my life;

2) that God will give me the grace to know what to say, how to say it, and that He will enable me to say it well, with charity^, grace, and humility;

3) that God will prepare their hearts to hear this shameful news that I have to tell them;

4) that somehow we will grow closer as a family, and that we will grow close as a Christian** family as a result of my openness with them.

*Humble, not as in the virtue of humility, but as in Merriam Webster's third definition of the word.

^I ask for charity because when I first outed myself to them, I didn't think about their feelings; my only concern was to unburden myself!

**We are all professing Christians, but some in my immediate family have separated themselves as far as they are able from all that would do them good. Pray for us!